I know, I know. I’ve been a very bad blogger.

But in my defence, it IS the school holidays and I do have an 8 year old B to keep entertained and an M who works the worlds shitiest hours.

So far though, this summer we have been all over the place.  Thorpe Park, Chessington World of Adventures, Alton Towers, Warwick Caste (x2) and Legoland.

I’m sure I’m missing something out, but you get the general idea.

It was also B’s 8th birthday on Monday. 8! I have a son who is 8!

And yes, I am far too young and attractive to have an 8 year old ~ I was indeed a child bride and he was born way before he was conceived*.

*Some of this may not, actually be true.

Facebook. A handy little way of keeping tabs on people that you don’t actually have the time (and in some cases, the inclination) to speak to in your day to day life.

Lots of old schoolpals and work colleagues have a nasty habbit of popping up from all over the place and sending friend requests.

And then there are the status updates. Some people post every detail of their life on there. No matter how small, how big and how private.

Don’t get me wrong. I love hearing about the safe arrival of my cousins baby, but I don’t need to know about MAP that my neice has had to rush out to buy nor that she has posted that her mum (my sister) still thinks that she’s a virgin.

And now the groups that people have joined have started to pop up on my screen. How lovely to know that people that I went to school with are fans of rough sex.

Now, I know that I’m a fairly private person. Even though I have a blog, I don’t tell everyone everything. I have three people that have requested my friendship on FB that I haven’t accepted yet, as I don’t want them to know what I’m up to, how much my friends and I swear or anything really.

I’ve deactivated my FB account about 3 times in the past few years, but in the end, I’m just too nosy and end up logging on again to see what everyone’s up to.
So, really, I suppose I should stop moaning about it.

Dad…so many images come to mind
whenever I speak your name;
It seems without you in my life
things have never been the same.

What happened to those lazy days
when I was just a child;
When my life was consumed in you
in your love, and in your smile.

What happened to all those times
when I always looked to you;
No matter what happened in my life
you could make my gray skies blue.

Dad, some days I hear your voice
and turn to see your face;
Yet in my turning…it seems
the sound has been erased.

Dad, who will I turn to for answers
when life does not make sense;
Who will be there to hold me close
when the pieces just don’t fit.

Oh, Dad, if I could turn back time
and once more hear your voice;
I’d tell you that out of all the dads
you would still be my choice.

Please always know I love you
and no one can take your place;
Years may come and go
but your memory will never be erased.

Today, Jesus, as You are listening
in your home above;
Would you go and find my dad
and give him all my love.

By Leah Wells

Look at what I bought today.

Check out the packaging! It’s the good old fashioned packet that we had back in the day.

I wish I’d bought more than one packet now though.

Monday morning started off as normal.  Running around trying to get B ready for school which involves the usual ~ me shouting at him to hurry up, find his shoes, book bag, lunch bag and swimming kit!   None of this was helped by the fact that it was absolutely pissing down with rain and was just a generally dark and dismal day.

Plus, once I had dropped B off at school, I had an appointment at another small school to have a look around. B’s not been happy at school recently, and although both M and I really don’t want B to go to a new school, we decided to go and have a mooch at this other one just in case.

This other school was ok. Bigger than the one that B’s at now. About 100 kids, as opposed to the 67, still with only 4 classes but I just didn’t love it, like I did when I first went to look at the school that B’s at now.  Plus, I wasn’t keen on the Acting Headmistress at this other school. She was such hard work.   The week before I had a lovely hour long chat with B’s teacher and I’m hoping that B will settle down again and feel happier.

Anyway, I got back from the other school, tried to phone M a few times to let him know how I got on, but kept being diverted to voicemail, so I left a message for him and just assumed that he was somewhere with bad signal.

I was wrong.

He’d been in a car crash!

He phoned me as he was leaving the hospital in Oxfordshire, but this time the signal was really bad and I could only make out a couple of words.  “Accident” and “Hospital” being the main ones.

Anyway, the upshot is that he was rear ended by another car as he was waiting for a car about 5 spaces infront to turn right. He’s ok, but seems to have whiplash, as well as being sore all over and his right knee is knackered again, which was damaged in his original car crash from about 5 years ago.

He’s been off work for the rest of the week and as of Wednesday, so was B. He has had the runs, and the school policy is that the kids aren’t allowed back at school until their stomachs (for wont of a better word) are settled down for 48 hours.

So Wednesday and Thursday were a barrel of laughs in the House of Pads, as I’m sure you can imagine. I almost ran out of the house with Gemma to take her for a walk on those days.

Friday, the car had to go in to the garage to be serviced, and because our local dealers are shitter than a shit thing, we take our car to Swindon. *sigh*  Obviously I had to drive because of M’s knackered knee and Swindon is an absolute bastard of a town.  Roundabouts fucking EVERYWHERE and M’s really not the best passenger in the world, so this was a fun filled trip. NOT!

But while the car was in the garage, we went shopping and I finally found (and bought) the Radley bag that I have been lusting over forever.

And of course, the cherry on the top of this particualar cake, was that it retails at £180 and I paid less than half.

Taken from Wiki: McDojo is a pejorative term used by some Western martial artists to describe a martial arts school where image or profit is of a higher importance than technical standards, and in the related use of martial arts franchising.

I read this post of Black Belt Mama’s a while ago which got me to thinking of all of the different ways that people look at their Martial Arts progress.

For me, it’s a way of feeling more secure and safe in the knowledge that I have at least a little bit of self defence.  Of course, I love going up through the different belts and the satisfaction of passing a grading and knowing that I did good.  But I’m also in no real hurry to get that Black Belt.  I know that I have a loooong way to go and a million things still to learn before I get there  ~ and to be honest, I’m looking forward to learning them.

One of my sisters however, I feel, has a different attitude.  And she doesn’t even train. It’s her kids who are members of what I laughingly refer to as a McDojo.  Not to her of course.  We have got to the point now where we’ve argued about the place that her kids go to, so much, that we’ve agreed to disagree. Her children, range from 15 down to 2 (ish) and the ones that are training are shooting through their belts at an alarming rate.  The older one’s didn’t start training until at least 7 months after me, and yet two of them are preparing for their Black Belts already.

We are training in two different styles of Karate ~ they don’t have to learn Kata and from the sounds of things, don’t practice Kumite at all ~ but stil!

Oh and did I mention that they advertise that YOU WILL HAVE A BLACK BELT WITHIN TWO YEARS.

WTF? How can they say that?  What if you’re not good enough for that belt? In fact, there are hundreds of “What if’s” that I could add there, but why waste my time.  That’s just the way they do business I suppose.

The thing is though, that when we were looking into Karate Schools for B, that was the first place that we went.

B and I were walking through Gloucester about a week after M and I had started discussing finding a club for B, when a couple of the students pounced on us.  That’s what they do, you see.  They stand around in their tracky suits in the main towns locally pouncing on people.

Anyhoo, they pounced on B and I as we were strolling through the shopping centre and we stopped. I gave them my phone number and a day or so later they phoned to arrange B’s free trial.

The 3 of us trotted off there and it was lovely. So plush and shiny.  Sprung flooring on the Dojo, a lovely viewing area for the parents to sit and watch the kids training and lovely friendly staff ~ even if they did go a little over the top (in my opinion) on the respect front.

As it turns out, the Sensei who was supposed to be giving B his free lesson, was running late and we ended up with his wife. Who I felt uncomfortable with from the start.   Obviously we were told almost immediately that B was a natural at Karate (insert eye roll here) and he was loving it.

So then we sat down to find out how much it would cost!

I forget the exact figure as it was about 3 years ago, but it was about £500 to join, and then an extra £30 or £40 per month on top of all that. Bless their hearts though, they would give us a free Gi.

I think it was that evening that M got out the Yellow Pages and phoned the Karate School that I’m still a member of now.

I may not have a Black Belt within 2 years, but when I do get it, I’ll know that I’ll have earned it. Sadly, B quit Karate in February. He’d been lacking interest for about 6 months and since Christmas had all but given up trying. He’d lost all interest and both M and I were beginning to resent paying for him to go when he had little or no interest.

I’d like to think this was true. But knowing how alive and kicking the Great British Reserve is, I find it very hard to believe.  It’s from an email I received the other week ~ and I thought I’d share it on my blog ~ just incase.

Last week I was in  West London attending a conference.

While I was in the airport, returning home, I heard several people behind me beginning to clap and cheer.

I immediately turned around and witnessed one of the greatest acts of patriotism I have ever seen.

Moving through the terminal was a group of soldiers in their uniforms, as they began heading to their gate everyone (well almost everyone) was abruptly to their feet with their hands waving and cheering.

When I saw the soldiers, probably 30-40 of them, being applauded and  cheered for, it hit me. I’m not alone. I’m not the only red blooded Briton who still loves this country   and supports our troops and their families. Of course I immediately stopped and began clapping for these young  unsung heroes who are putting their lives on the line everyday for us so we can go to school, work, and enjoy our home without fear or reprisal.

Just when I thought I could not be more proud of my country or of our service men and women a young girl, not more than 6 or 7 years old, ran up to one of the male soldiers.

He knelt down and said ‘hi,’ the little girl then asked him if he would give something to her daddy for her.

The young soldier didn’t look any older than maybe 22 himself, said he would try and what did she want to give to her daddy.

Suddenly the little girl grabbed the neck of this soldier, gave him the biggest hug she could muster and then kissed him on the cheek.

The mother of the little girl, who said her daughters name was Courtney, told the young soldier that her husband was a Corporal and had been in Afghanistan for 5 months now.

As the mum was explaining how much her daughter, Courtney, missed her father, the young soldier began to tear up.

When this temporarily single mum was done explaining her situation, all of the soldiers huddled together for a brief second.

Then one of the other servicemen pulled out a military looking walkie-talkie.

They started playing with the device and talking back and forth on it.

After about 10-15 seconds of this, the young soldier walked back over to Courtney, bent down and said this to her, ‘I spoke to your daddy and he told me to give this to you.’

He then hugged this little girl that he had just met and gave her a Kiss on the cheek.

He finished by saying ‘Your daddy told me to tell you that he loves you more than anything and he is coming home very soon.’

The mum at this point was crying almost uncontrollably and as the young soldier stood to his feet he saluted Courtney and her mum.

I was standing no more than 6 feet away as this entire event unfolded.

As the soldiers began to leave, heading towards their gate, people resumed their applause.

As I stood there applauding and looked around, there were very few dry eyes, including my own.

That young soldier in one last act of moment turned around and blew a kiss to Courtney with a tear rolling down his cheek.

These classified were really put in the paper - a smile for your day

FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
8 years old. Hateful little bastard. Bites!

FREE PUPPIES
1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor’s dog.

FREE PUPPIES.
Mother, A Kennel Club registered German Shepherd.
Father, Super Dog . Able to leap tall fences in a single bound.

FOUND DIRTY WHITE DOG.
Looks like a rat. Been out a while.
Better be a big reward.

COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED.
Also 1 gay bull for sale.

JOINING NUDIST COLONY!
Must sell washer and dryer £100.

WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE .
Worn once by mistake. Call Stephanie.

And the best one:

FOR SALE BY OWNER. Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica, 45 volumes. Excellent condition. £200 or best offer. No longer needed,
Got married last month. Wife knows everything.

Go to www.google.co.uk {or com, if that’s your thing.}

Type in your first name, and the word needs.

For best results, put the search phrase in quotes.

According to Google, what are the Top Ten things that you need?

It doesn’t work for me if I use the name Pawpads, so the following are the results for my real name.

1. A doctor
2. To smarten up    Hey, I’m sat here in my Jimjams ~ how smart do you expect me to be at this time of night?
3. To get over Diddy     Diddy? As in P Diddy? Nah, I don’t think so!
4. Entertaining
5. The camera
6. Toilet paper          Have you been hanging around outside my bathroom, again?
7. Rehoming            True. I just need to win the Lottery first.
8. A change
9. An op                  What do you know that I don’t???
10. Your love and help.